Employee Insubordination

The Ask a House Cleaner Show and Podcast with Angela Brown

How do you handle employee insubordination in your house cleaning business? And how do you manage problem employees?

Listen: Employee Insubordination

Watch: Employee Insubordination

Hey there, I’m Angela Brown, and this is Ask a House Cleaner. This is a show where you get to ask a house cleaning question, and I get to help you find an answer. You can find this and 400 other answered questions in this series on our YouTube channel.

Have You Had Insubordinate Employees

Did you ever have an insubordinate employee who talked smack about your company to other coworkers and to your clients or they disrupted the service that you are providing by going rogue and not filling out checklists?

They’re not bringing their own cleaning supplies or not having the right cleaning supplies with them, not responding when you text them messages, just challenging authority and all those kinds of things?

Have you ever had somebody like that in your company and what on earth do you do about it?

Having Insubordinate Employees is Frustrating

There’s a house cleaner and she’s just one hair short of firing an employee for insubordination and she’s super frustrated and she wants to know, “Is there anything else that I can do?”

Well, it takes me back to when I was about this tall. I was a young child but I’m one of 19 kids. I’m the fourth to the oldest. And mom and dad had one kid every single year. So, there are no twins, no triplets, but my mom was pregnant pretty much the whole entire time I was growing up.

And so, if I misbehaved or I acted out it was heightened by her hormones and her migraine headaches and all that stuff. So, it wasn’t pleasant for her to try to punish me and I was this rambunctious kid with lots of energy.

How My Parents Resolved Punishments

So, in order to resolve the punishment issue in our house, mom and dad had this great big archway as you walked inside the house and they hung on these little nails that run all across the top of the archway of the house, they hung a little cardboard smiley face.

And then if we would misbehave mom would turn it over and it became a frowny face. I know super scary, right? But it had all of our initials over those nails, so every person had one smiley face or a frowny face. And so, Yolanda, Jennifer, Peter, Angela, Thomas, Jacob, Stephen, Samuel, Julia, Melanie, Michael, Joseph, Joshua, Brigham, okay all the way down.

All right. So, what happens is my dad would walk in from work and he would just look at the archway and mine would be turned over to a frown and he would say, “Angela in my den,” that was it.

My Dad’s Form of Punishment

And so, did he talk to mom already? Did he know what I did? How in trouble am I already? I didn’t know. So, I would go into his den and he had this great big leather chair, and it was one of those great big, tall wingback chairs.

I was tiny so I would get dwarfed in this great big chair and he would sit right there on the ottoman in front of me. Then he would hold my hand and he would look right into my eyes and he’d say, “Angela, you’re a very bright little girl. Can you share with me what happened today and your reasons for it?” I’m sure he had a very good reason. And then he would let me talk.

He would listen, and I would share with him my side of the story. Then when I was done, he would say like here’s the gap that he’s bridging, “Your mom is pregnant, and she doesn’t feel well. What can we do, you and me, we’re here on a team together, what can we do to make her life easier?” So, then I would come up with solutions as to what I thought we could do to remedy this situation. I’m the one that caused the problem, now I’m the one that has to come with a solution.

He Let Me Choose How to Resolve the Issue

Then when I was done, he would say, “What do you think is a fair punishment, or how do you think we should resolve this?” And so, I would come up with things, “I’ll help with the dishes. I’ll read stories to the kids, I’ll help pick up this. And I’ll do an extra load of laundry.”

Finally, he would stop, and he would say, “Okay, why don’t you go start on those tasks.” And then he would release me, and I would go start on those tasks so that I could pay off whatever it is that I had misbehaved for.

He never made me feel sad or stupid for the thing I had done during the day. Because as a child, maybe I had a very good reason, or I thought I did for why I behaved that way. If I didn’t have a very good reason, this conversation that we had unraveled for me, and I realized the stupid mistakes that I’d made. But he never ever challenged my decision on what I had done.

What he challenged me on was, “Can we do better? What can we do to help mom? And what do you think is a fair punishment?” And he gave me 100% of the responsibility to remedy that situation.

Why Insubordinate Employees Challenge Authority

So now, going back to the insubordinate employee. Insubordinate employees challenge authority for a particular reason. And it is easy for us as employers to come in and write them up and say, “We’re going to punish you two more times and you’re out of here,” and let them go and all these things but what is the reason why? And so, one of the things that have served me best in my business over the years is to have that conversation and say, “Hey listen, I’m sure you have a very good reason for your behavior. What is going on here? Can you share with me what is happening and why you chose these particular methods to follow?”

And then when they start talking you can listen, “Okay. So, here’s what’s happening in our company. Here’s how it’s being perceived by other employees. Here’s what’s happening with our customer base. Can we, you and me, how can we resolve that?”

Then give them one more, “What do you think is a fair way to resolve this? What do you think is a fair punishment for this type of behavior now and if it should happen again?”

Let Your Employees Come Up With the Solution

And let them come up with the solution. Because already the reason they’re challenging authority is that they think they have the solutions. And so, they will come up with solutions for you because you acknowledged the fact and you validated the fact that they do have smart ideas, that they do have a voice, and that their voice matters, and that you are willing to listen.

So immediately what you’ve done is removed all of the angst from the situation and that, “I’m so mad I just want to fire that person.” Because that is our first instinct, we want to fire that person and remove cancer from our business.

But if we stop and we say, “Hey listen, you’re a very important part of our business and I would like for us moving forward to work together as a team. Can you help me with that? What do you think is a fair way to do that?” And put them back in control so that they can be part of the solution for the problem they themselves created.

It’s an Amazing Way to Work Through Some Issues

It is an amazing way to work through some of the issues that you are going to have if you haven’t had already, that you are going to have as a business owner.

So, my suggestion for this particular house cleaner, before you fire your insubordinate employee, because I know that’s the thing that we want to do, we want to get rid of them. But challenge yourself to have a conversation first and find out where they’re coming from and the reasons behind the behavior.

Because oftentimes it will uncover a whole bunch of other things that you didn’t even know about your business and ways that you can work together. If people feel like they’re being listened to. If people think that you care and that you are part of their solution, behavior changes almost overnight. I’ve seen it a lot and it’s a lesson I learned from my dad.

Resources

These good karma links connect you to Amazon.com and affiliated sites that offer products or services that relate to today’s show.

How to Deal with Difficult Employees at Work – https://amzn.to/3pm4PDP

Problem Employee? No Problem – https://amzn.to/38tLeuG

The New One Minute Manager – https://amzn.to/2KU14qt

Leading the Unleadable: How to Manage Mavericks, Cynics, Divas, and Other Difficult People – https://amzn.to/2KXcIAA

The Manager’s Path: A Guide for Tech Leaders Navigating Growth and Change – https://amzn.to/3aHtiQa

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